I'm Enraged By Peeps On Pizza And You Should Be Too

Down with Peepza!!!
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Stop trying to make Peepza happen. It’s not going to happen.

Twitter user @AustinOnSocial tweeted out the following divisive photograph on Sunday afternoon and I’m shook:

@AustinOnSocial is attempting to suggest that Peepza is better than pineapple pizza. I’m aware pineapple as a pizza topping has long been controversial and it isn’t my cup of tea, but power to the people who enjoy that! Let them live!

Peeps, however, need to GTFO.

Here’s where Peeps belong: in your mouth, in holiday gift baskets, on a napkin in a microwave awaiting explosion.

Here’s where they don’t belong: ON PIZZA.

Also, Peeps are the kind of food that you can have too many of in a single sitting. Sure, the marshmallow sugary goodness is satisfying after one, two, or maybe three. But think of the hell you’re inflicting on your stomach when you combine those saccharine pillow birds with the dairy grease sheet that is pizza?!

Think I’m being too harsh? Well, many people on Twitter seem to agree that this is an affront to the sanctity of pizza.

Hell, pizza-purveyor DiGiorno’s even got in on this and was like, “Nope”:

Leave the Peeps off the pizza, you guys. And, while you’re at it, keep the milk away too.

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