'In my heart I wanted to be a fighter pilot'

You have played international cricket for a few years now. Has it been enjoyable?
It has certainly been very enjoyable. The best part of this journey has been the different challenges any international cricketer would come across. It certainly hasn't been easy. Going forward, I hope it will be even more enjoyable. Different sorts of challenges will come in, different sorts of performances you have to put in for the team to win the game.

What have the challenges been?
I think settling into international cricket was difficult for us. In my opinion, our domestic structure hasn't got the quality of spinners or pacers you come across in international cricket. You regularly come across 140-145 clicks, and in domestic cricket we only had one guy who bowled 140. International cricket is a big step up, not just for me but any Zimbabwean coming into international cricket, and that's why it takes some of us a lot longer to adjust and bring out the performances than the other guys. I am not trying to use that as an excuse. I think if I am realistic, I wouldn't want to put them under pressure. For me they must come up and enjoy international cricket, work on their game and get better.

One of the best days in your short career was leading Zimbabwe unexpectedly and winning that T20 game against India.
I think the game was starting at one o'clock and I was told at about 12.10 in the afternoon that I will be captaining. I think that's why I didn't overthink it, which was a good thing.

We got the team sheet wrong as well. I didn't want the opposition captain to be waiting for me because we were hoping Elton [Chigumbura] would be fit. He is one of our best players. The analyst and I had to write in a different team sheet. It was a lot of pressure at that time, but now when you look back you enjoy those moments.

And when you got on the field?
The emphasis was that I was captaining Zimbabwe. I do not care who I play against, but the most important thing for me is to represent Zimbabwe, and I do that with a lot of honour. It was great to lead this great bunch of boys.

A captain has to start from the bottom of the queue. You have to take everybody forward. To win an international game, you have to do everything necessary. I was fortunate that most of the guys were playing well. To be honest, the job was made a lot easier because [Graeme] Cremer bowled well. [Taurai] Muzarabani and [Chris] Mpofu finished the game well. I thought it was one of those days when everything happened for us.

What did you take away from the game?
I think the game put a sense of responsibility in me that this is how I am looked at by the board and senior players. I wasn't the senior most but I was asked to captain. My players respected that decision and backed me 100%. I started to bowl a lot more and bat longer after that game.

When I became a father, I realised that sense of responsibility even more. In cricketing terms, that game helped me in a lot of ways that I didn't even know.

How do you prepare?
I do homework on who I will be facing. If I am not going to be facing 140kph in the matches, there's no point in facing 140kph in the nets. I prepare for different tours differently. Some have seam and some have spin challenges. On some tours I may be batting down the order, which means I have to hit out most of the time instead of building an innings. If I can be brutally honest with you, I think one of the reasons I haven't performed in the last five to seven games is because I haven't prepared well. I think it is something for which I have to look in the mirror and say, this is what I need to do to prepare myself for the next tour if I am given the honour to be picked in the Zimbabwe squad.

Since you are not from Zimbabwe, did it take a lot of time to get to know your team-mates?
It has been 13 years since we moved to Zimbabwe as a family. I was away in Scotland for my studies for a lot of those years. I only started playing cricket in 2009.

I think it depends on the sort of person you are. I think culturally, Zimbabwean people are very warm. Their doors are open for you. If you don't have the right attitude towards others, it will be difficult for them to accept you for who you are. It was never made difficult for me. You expect some differences, because if you don't then there's something wrong. I guess in Zimbabwe, in our changing rooms and our culture, everybody is ready to accept everybody.

How was it playing in Pakistan?
In the first game we certainly had some goosebumps. I felt for the people of Pakistan. For a country whose people love the sport, not to have international cricket for six years - I had those goosebumps because of how they treated us. The amount of love they showed. Some of the Pakistani players were quite emotional as well. I felt their pain.

There are now many cricketers like yourself, uprooting themselves from where they were born and brought up, and playing cricket for another country. When you come across anyone like that, do you exchange notes?
For me it was destiny. I was never meant to play cricket. In my heart I wanted to be a fighter pilot. After that dream didn't come true, I wanted to be a software engineer. That also didn't come through. I think this shows that God has a better plan for you than you do for yourself. Some guys may have migrated to other countries to play cricket. I didn't, so when I actually meet some of them, the only word we say is destiny - here we are.

I still watch programmes about fighter planes with a lot of interest. It gives me goosebumps. It gets me emotional. It was my dream. The idea was never planted in my head by my family.

In Pakistan they have two Air Force cadet colleges. I was lucky enough to go to PAF Lower Topa, which is in Murree, from Grade 7 to 12. Unfortunately, I was medically unfit after the 10th. I couldn't go to the reunion in the first week of July last year, but I would love to go back there.

How many times have you watched Top Gun?
Just once, but see, it is just a movie. I am quite a realistic person. Some of my friends who were with me are now fighter pilots. Some of them are on F-16s and some are flying instructors. I feel quite happy and blessed. Some of them were shaheed [martyred] trying to protect people. Everyone is going to die, but what better way is there? There was something wrong with their planes, so it was either that they ejected and saved their lives and the plane crashed into a populated area or they tried to take the plane away from that area. Two of my friends were blessed with such a beautiful death.

Has the experience of having stayed away from home from the time you were young helped you as a cricketer?
It certainly helps you in making decisions. You have to live by it, whether it is wrong or right. You can't give credit or blame anyone. My family supported me throughout my time in the boarding schools, studying in Scotland, and now I am playing cricket, which is also like a boarding school.

I am never home. I think my son gets affected the most. I think he will understand that the things that I did were for the family and the country who gave me this honour.

Does the lack of Test cricket affect you in any way?
I think it does affect all of us. Test cricket teaches us the game. I don't want to take the limelight away from T20s but I've learnt a lot of cricket from those four Tests than the 50 ODIs that I've played. I think the little success I have had is because of Test cricket. We may not see the side effects this year but not playing Tests certainly has taken the shine out of our ODI and to some extent, T20 cricket.

Does it bother you that cricket is a game where one bad performance can take it all away?
I have moved past that insecurity. I will use this tour as a perfect example. I was dropped for the last game [second T20 against Bangladesh]. I haven't performed in the last five or six games. I deserved to be dropped, and playing for Zimbabwe is something you have to earn. You can't expect things to fall into your lap. The decision to drop me didn't hurt me but what hurt me was that I hadn't been doing well. Sometimes it is not a bad thing to take a step back and watch it from outside. You can see where you've gone wrong.

Last year I played all 42 games for Zimbabwe. I played the first six games this year, so I have played nearly 50 games in a row, and I feel blessed to have done so. When the selectors came up to me and the coach and said they were going to drop me, I didn't have any bad feelings. I took it on the chin. I just want to prove it to myself - you have to get back and score runs, take wickets and catches.

Keith Miller once said, "Pressure is a Messerschmitt up your arse. Playing cricket is not". You are someone who can actually relate to it.
I used to train to be a pilot. Now that I am training to be a cricketer, it could be slightly easier. I think training for a pilot would be a lot more difficult. (smiles)