Twins Yogendra and Nishant Mule tell how they came out to their family

“Double the giggles, 
double the grins,
double the trouble when
you’re blessed with twins!”
— Anonymous

We were in Standard 9 (my twin brother Nishant and I) in Parle Tilak Vidyalaya (a Marathi-medium school in Mumbai), when sex education was introduced to us. Our adolescent minds already knew the words used for human genitalia, but when our teacher explained copulation between the opposite sex, other terms such as gender identity and homosexuality came into our vocabulary. Questions hovered in the room.

Thank God we didn’t have a homophobic teacher. To satiate our inquisitive minds, the professor explained the terms in short and didn’t elaborate. The lecture cleared many misconceptions and we both decided that we would come out to our family. That night post dinner, we made our parents, grandmother and our elder sibling sit down. Then we broke the news. Our bags were packed and we had emptied our piggy banks. In case our family threw us out, we were prepared to feel to our native Goa. We were expecting a few flying slippers and slaps, but there were no signs of aggression. Concern was the only expression we could read on their faces.

Our family had hints about our sexuality—our effeminate body language, the Barbie dolls and kitchen set, and the 90’s pop music videos we would watch so voraciously and dance to, all decked up in our grandmother and mother’s clothes. Our father broke the ice: “We are your parents. We love you and respect your decision and your sexual orientation. If we do not accept and respect you, society will discriminate against you.” Our mother backed him saying, “You are only 14 years old. You have your career to look forward to. Our happiness resides in yours; at the same time, you’ll have to respect our decisions as well!” They also added: “If anyone calls you names, teases or discriminates against you, don’t hesitate to tell us. We’ll face those problems together!” We promised them we wouldn’t embarrass them or malign our family name.

Their acceptance meant we could focus on our careers instead of living a dual, hidden life. Today, my brother and I are both openly gay. Nishant loves cooking, studied hotel management and works with a five-star hotel. 

I pursued my Masters in Social Work and am an actor, writer and an androgynous model. I have worked in several TV reality shows. My last Marathi short film Sundar has received many international awards and is critically acclaimed. We wear our orientation with pride. We’ve heard many coming-out stories go wrong, where queer folk have faced extortion, physical and verbal abuse, and so on. A family is a link to the past and the bridge to our future.

(Yogendra Anant Anita Mule is a 23-year-old LGBTQ activist, model and filmmaker in Mumbai; Nishant works in the hospitality industry.)

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