Canada kashaala? Mumbai la yaa!!

I always say that I can be gay in Mumbai and no god-damn person can take my swag away in this city. Despite all its differences, politics, and also its own share of homophobia, transphobia and biphobia, this city is still where you can be in 'gay abandon'. The co-passenger on a train will still be more bothered about alighting at Dadar station, even if you are a male wearing the strongest of mascara and nail polish to match the buttons of your frock like shirt. That's how Mumbai operates. We are largely not discriminatory, but we are also not discriminatory because we don't have the time to discriminate.

Friday night, after being on the panel of SheThePeople's event where I spoke about homosexuality, I met with someone who was visiting from Himachal Pradesh. He was in the city to just meet me and check if he could migrate to Canada and if I could give him a reference letter as an internationally recognised activist for the cause. I listened to him for over three hours as pitchers of beer kept flowing inside my bloodstream. He told me that the society he lives in is not accepting and wants him to conform to a heteronormative lifestyle. I listened to him without belittling his fears. He had accepting parents and wanted to migrate with them to another country by way of seeking asylum.

I asked him if he really finds it so difficult that he would want to migrate to another country. Why not consider migrating to Mumbai instead? He responded saying it's still India and wasted no time in stereotyping all Indians as homophobes. I promptly got up from my seat and almost screamed, "HELLO! I AM GAY."

Forget homophobia, apart from a few stares, I get no attention. I joked that "Kissi ko yahaan padi nahi hain.. how boring, na?" He refused to listen and went on a tirade against me on how I happen to rub my privilege on his face and that I could have just denied him the letter minus the drama. At this point, I looked straight into his roving eye and told him, "I have shown you the truth that you don't wish to see."

Migration is an option for war-torn countries or people who are challenged with threats of being chased, kidnapped or even hacked to death. Agreed, one in India could also face such challenges, but one should be wary of using it as a weapon to further your life goals of working in a foreign country. Though one can't generalise and I empathise with cases that are genuine, I am also aware of some who fabricate hate as a lottery ticket to migrate.

Sorry babes, good try. Pann aikaaa… tum shaana, tar me, dedh shaana!

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