This was published 7 years ago
Why the parkrun concept is taking Australia by storm
By Peter FitzSimons
You will recall TFF's rant of 10 days ago that what Australia needed more of was less corporate slug-fests, awash in match-fixing, dodgy deals, bodgy people, bikies and furious factional fighting and more community sport, a la the newly formed Lane Cove Fun Run. My theme was that when you get a whole community involved it is fabulous, and I proceeded to give a how-to-wow-and-get-your-own-fun-run started.
Many readers wrote in and noted that in between such fun runs, there is already in existence in Australia, and indeed around the world, a fantastic community running activity called parkrun, run by volunteers. The essence of it is a free, weekly, five-kilometre timed run, starting mostly at 8am on Saturdays, aligned with Athletics Australia, and occurring at 160 venues around Australia.
Community sport: The parkrun is growing in popularity.Credit: Elesa Kurtz
I googled it, joined, and last Saturday turned up 7am – my local parkrun is an hour earlier – at that park next to the Spit Bridge. Sure enough, there were 60 local people of all stripes and ages. I ran, and finished in 28 minutes and 52 seconds, which was 90 seconds faster than at Lane Cove, and fastest of my 55+ age group.
I am going to try to lower it again this Saturday. Great activity, great people. One thing though. Even though the idea is to compete against yourself, rather than others, I can't resist. I think we need a new formula of virtue. I was 112 kilograms last Saturday – down from 152kgs at my worst, thanks for asking – and, as noted, I did it in 28mins, 52s = 1732s. I now divide my time by my weight and it means it took me 15.46 seconds for every kilo.
Illustration: John Shakespeare
Now Mark Arbib, the president of Athletics Australia, is 70kg, and his best time is, (the show-off!) an impressive 18mins, 30s, which means – dot three, carry seven, subtract five – he is taking 15.85 secs for every kilo! This means ... I WIN! Anyway, it dinkum is taking Australia by storm. Give it a go, and see how you go.
That sinking feeling
Love this, from British pro golfer Andrew "Beef" Johnston in Golf Digest: "The stages of drinking are as follows. First there is Relaxed and Social – think, normal people filling the bar at 6pm. Second stage is Let's Have One More. This is where the quality of your mates is established and you want more of a good time. Third comes Where Are We Going Next? That's when the mysteries of the night begin calling. Fourth up: Hammered. It's a full-on party, even when you aren't really celebrating anything. Fifth: The Really Drunk Guy. You start sentences with, 'I'm being completely serious.' This can be bad news. The sixth stage, the last and worst, is The Journey Home. Here you're tired, have advanced feelings of regret and just want to get to your bed."
That is, I reckon, unless you get to the seventh stage, in which case you are Robert Allenby. And that's when the trouble REALLY starts!
One of the best yarns of the week goes to Roy Masters, concerning the beloved rugby league identity, Ron Massey, who died on Monday. See, way back when, John Singleton offered to shout Massey a lunch where he could invite his 10 best mates. Sure. The date was agreed upon, the swish restaurant arranged, and Massey provided the list of invitees.
But there was a problem, a real one.
Singo didn't make the cut.
"How many have I got to invite before I can get on the list?" Singo asked.
Massey did his calculations and told him.
The lunch took place, with Singleton just squeezing in at 26th man, with other invitees including John Quayle, Wayne Bennett and Roy himself.
Kicking tyres
Two months ago, my mate Paul Waterhouse attended a GWS Giants game, and was selected at random from the crowd to try and kick a football 40 metres into a stack of Toyo tyres, with the promise of $100K if he nailed it. As you know, he did, and went on to live happily ever after! Saturday, at the Giants v Bulldogs match at Spotless Stadium, they're doing it again. One fan will be chosen at quarter-time. They'll be given one kick, in front of the 30,000 people assembled. 'Cept this time, if you get it, you'll get $250,000. Stranger things have happened.
Steelers' gold
TFF's heroes of the weeks are the Steelers, our wheelchair rugby team who, in front of a roaring crowd of 12,500 people in Rio, secured the last gold medal at the Paralympic Games in a one-point double-overtime thriller over the United States team – the first time the Steelers have beaten the US in a game at a major tournament. Meantime, at the closing ceremony it was also announced that our own Kurt Fearnley – just pipped at the post for the gold medal in the wheelchair marathon that day – was one of six athletes elected to the IPC's Athlete's Council. All up, a great job by our mob, led by Australian Paralympics president Glenn Tasker, and chef de mission Kate McLoughlin. Welcome home events to be held around the country starting with Sydney on October 4.
They said it
Sharks five-eighth James Maloney, last Sunday: "I am going to go for a record cliche here. There is no 'i' in team, we're just going to take it one week at a time, you know, we're definitely the underdogs." Not the record. Somewhere, he needed to throw in the word "disappointing". I suspect it will be added after their match against the Cowboys.
Eddie Hayson, last week, defending his involvement with the highly troubled Kieran Foran, which included taking the footballer – fresh from rehab for gambling problems, etc – out to the races and facilitating placing bets at the TAB: "If I wasn't in his life this year, he probably wouldn't be alive."
Bec Pope, estranged partner of Foran and mother of his children, on Hayson's remarks: "How dare you!!!!! You are absolute scum of the earth, Eddie Hayson."
An unnamed NRL player, on Hayson to my colleague Andrew Webster: "Thank f--- I have nothing to do with him any longer. Wherever Eddie is, trouble follows." Hard to argue, surely? And I think, on balance, you'd rather be stuck in a lift for a long weekend with John Hopoate than Hayson.
NSW Police spokesman on Thursday evening: "A 42-year-old man attended Manly Police Station yesterday afternoon where he was charged with contravening an Apprehended Personal Violence Order, intimidation and stealing." The accused is John Hopoate. Again.
Channel Nine commentator and rugby league Immortal Andrew Johns on the Broncos v North Queensland Cowboys match: "It was the best game I've ever seen."
2GB league commentator and Immortal Bobby Fulton on Thurston, after the Cowboys put the Broncos to the sword: "He's the best player I've ever seen."
World Cup-winning All Blacks coach Sir Graham Henry on the Wallabies: "I think it's probably the worst Australian team I have ever seen and that's a real worry for the game."
Wayne Bennett: "I have separated from my wife and the family home some time ago. I will continue to appear publicly in my role at the Brisbane Broncos but at the same time ask that you respect my personal privacy and that of my family."
Ricky Stuart ahead of the game against the Storm: "I'm not one of those coaches who is going to come out and start having a shot about wrestle, which seems to happen every time someone plays against Melbourne ... " At this point, friends, Ricky was merely clearing his throat for the rant to come!
Rome mayor Virginia Raggi nixing Rome applying to bid for the 2024 Olympics: "We are effectively asking the people of Rome and of Italy to shoulder the debts. We just don't support it. No to the Olympics of concrete, absolutely not! No to cathedrals in the desert." They maintain, seriously, they are still paying off the 1960 Olympics. The only bidders remaining for 2024 are Budapest, Paris and Los Angeles.
New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick, frustrated when asked questions about a player's health: "I'm a football coach; I'm not a doctor. I coach the team; the medical people handle the injuries. They don't call plays. I don't do surgeries. We have a great deal there. It works out good."
Marin Cilic on leading Croatia to the Davis Cup Final: "I played incredible tennis. I produced a great performance for all the crowd."
Ryley Batt, who top scored for Australia's gold medal in the Paralympics rugby with 27 goals. "This is the happiest day of my life. I really shouldn't say that because I'm married and my wedding day should be the best day of my life, but I think my missus would agree, it's pretty cool – world champion, two-time Paralympic champion, double-overtime win by one goal. I'm on top of the world." Congrats to the lot of them.
TEAM OF THE WEEK
Canberra Raiders. If they win Saturday night against the Storm it will be a fabulous rugby league story of resuscitation, redemption and renaissance. If the Storm win, it's just another Storm win. Ho bloody hum. Seen 'em before. Bored with 'em.
Michael Ennis. I don't know the result as I write this, but I suspect Friday night's clash between Cronulla and North Queensland is his last after a great, storied, and entertainingly irritating, and irritatingly entertaining, career. Good luck to him.
Croatia/Argentina. Are to contest this year's Davis Cup final. Call it the World Cup – play it only every two years – and people might care.
Daniel Ricciardo. Finished second in Singapore in the Formula One thingammy.
Hawthorn. For the first time since 2011 won't be in the grand final.
Suit and Try touch football team. Took out the Division 4 Sydney Uni Mixed Touch Premiership on the weekend, besting, yes, the "Complete Dicks" in a thriller.
Glee Women's A Grade Hockey team. Won their 16th CONSECUTIVE Far North Coast grand final.
Australia's Tug of War team. Beat Serbia, France and Wales at the World Titles in Sweden to achieve Australia's best placing, 17/21, since the 1980s.
RIP Luke Spalding. Diagnosed with a particularly aggressive cancer five years ago, the then 13-year-old continued to drive race cars successfully, sometimes going from hospital straight to the racetrack. Won a Formula 3 championship last year. Alas, he died last weekend. If you would like to support his iPad charity.
RIP Ron Massey. A beloved league identity for the last 50 years – at least to those in the know, inside the game – he made his reputation as the right-hand man of Jack Gibson and was also close to Wayne Bennett. He died on Monday, aged 86.
Twitter: @Peter_Fitz