We had just finished a series of interactions with students, and as faculty often do, we were sitting around discussing the sessions, sharing our impressions and reactions. While recounting a particular exchange, one of my colleagues mentioned that the student had repeatedly used the term “you guys” while speaking to them. Call me old-fashioned, but I was quite taken aback. My colleague was quick to reassure me that there had been no disrespect in the student’s tone. “This is the way they speak to each other,” she explained.
Of course we talk to our friends in a variety of informal ways, using terms such as “guys” and “dudes.” Such forms of address are completely acceptable, even welcome, among peers in informal contexts. We suffix our conversations with “ yaar ” in north India and “ machaan ” in south India, and liberally sprinkle our sentences with “ re ” and “ da ” to indicate friendship and closeness. As students, we speak more with our friends and peers than we do with anyone else — other than family, perhaps — and so this mode of informal conversation dominates our speech. In most mainstream schools, there are strict codes of interacting with teachers and administrators, and we get used to those expectations as well, slipping into accepted modes of speaking to the adults in our lives. But as we ourselves enter adulthood, and the gap between us and our so-called “superiors”— professors, supervisors and bosses — gets narrower, those boundaries begin to dissolve. In many workplaces, particularly in multinationals, informality is encouraged. The use of first names is common, and hardly anyone uses “Sir” or “Madam” even when speaking to higher-ups. The idea is that respect doesn’t lie in addressing someone formally, but it lies in tone, manner and attitude.
So then, is there anything wrong with a student addressing a bunch of professors as “you guys,” as long as it is said in a respectful tone?
Well…um… maybe not. But then, I wouldn’t recommend it.
Of course, there’s a wide variation in the culture of interaction across organisations, and across different kinds of educational institutions. It’s a good idea to try to understand that, gathering inputs through observation and by talking to more experienced insiders. How do people at different levels address each other? What are the conventions around interactions of various kinds? Is it very rule-bound and hierarchical or is it open and easy-going?
In general, it is better to err on the side of formality than what might end up being seen as excessive informality, or even impertinence. It is better to use forms of address such as “Mr”, “Ms” (pronounced Miz), “Mrs”, “Dr” or “Professor” while speaking to teachers or someone who is in a supervisory role — unless they specifically ask you to address them differently. It is not always about being formal, but about being polite… and, yes, respectful. It is entirely possible to be informal in attitude and respectful in tone — for instance, joking with your professor yet addressing them as “Dr Murthy” or as is often done in India, “Murthy Sir” or “Meera Ma’am”. (And don’t assume that a woman is always “Mrs”!)
ContextsAll of us live and interact across a variety of contexts, formal, informal, private, professional, family, community, friends, and so on. We use language in different ways in each of these contexts — a variation that linguists call “register.” But because for many of us, English is not the language of primary communication, we may not have the same level of comfort in switching registers in English as we do in our own languages. This can lead to awkwardness when we move between contexts. So while we know the formal way to address an individual, we may not be so sure about how to address a collective, a group that is sitting across from you. Hence, slips such as “you guys.” How exactly do we address a panel of interviewers? What is the term we use when we want to refer to that group as a collective? When we are with a bunch of friends it is perfectly okay to say something like: “I know you guys like comics” or ask, “Do you guys want to see my latest photos?” But you can’t hand over a portfolio to an interview panel and say: “I’d like you guys to look at this”!
In such an instance, to inject that appropriate note of formality, you could use the third person: “I’d like the panel to look at my portfolio” or “I’ve heard that academics read very widely.” Or simply use the third person plural “you”: “Would you like to look at my portfolio?” or “I’ve heard a lot about you.”
The nuances of language can make all the difference to how we are perceived, and send signals about a variety of personality traits that interview panels are constantly looking for. So it is worthwhile to pause a little, take in the context, and think about what words you should use. And when in doubt, just be formal.
The author teaches at the University of Hyderabad and edits Teacher Plus. Email: usha.bpgll@gmail.com
