Lesbians of Tamil diaspora ring back home for support

Chennai: With no one to really talk to in their native language, lesbians scattered across the Tamil diaspora in places like Dubai and Malaysia are calling the lesbian helpline back home in Chennai. Some call for support, some call for solutions, some call to even check if a secret marriage can be arranged for them and their partners.
The helpline for lesbians was launched in 2009 by the Indian Community Welfare Organisation (ICWO) as the first such dedicated telephonic support group in the country.While in the first few months of the launch, helpline support staff had to spend most of their time fending off curious callers, the calls became more serious within a year. "We had women calling from rural areas to talk to our volunteers because they had no one to speak to in their village. Talking to someone about their orientation would mean lynching," says AJ Hariharan, founder of ICWO.
In the last year, he adds, calls have started coming in from the Tamil diaspora in places like Malaysia and the UAE. "While in some countries homosexuality is still not acceptable, in others there are support groups, but they have no one who can speak Tamil or understand the culture these women come from," says Hariharan.
Jenny, a volunteer at the helpline, says the overseas calls she has taken are from women who have gone to Dubai to work and in the hope of living without fear. "Most of them are in low-paying jobs. And they realise that they can't live openly as lesbians," she says. A lesbian herself, Jenny, who works as a make-up assistant in the Tamil film industry, says she understands what her distressed callers are going through.
"My father has not accepted my sexual orientation though my mother has. For a long time I had no one I could talk to until I joined a support group that spoke my language," says Jenny, who handles calls from both Tamil and Malayalee diaspora.
"So when these women call me saying there they want to speak to someone who can understand their language and culture, I know what they mean," says Jenny, who adds that not only do the women feel alone overseas, they are too scared to admit their sexual orientation or confide in a colleague for fear of losing their jobs.
"We have had calls where women have asked us if they can return to India to marry their partners and if we would help arrange the marriage. We have also had women calling in panic because someone from their place of work has threatened to tell their parents here of their orientation and they wanted us to help," says Jenny, who adds that some of the callers are women who thought that working overseas would make it easier to live as lesbians, but realise it is just as hard and sometimes even lonelier.