Divyanka Tripathi: After my break-up with Ssharad, shooting on sets was getting difficult

Excerpts from the interview with Divyanka Tripathi, who is playing the role of Ishita in Ye Hai Mohabbatein.

Ques: Are you back to your normal self, Divyanka?

Divyanka: Normal is something that is usual. I can’t be my old usual self again. After certain ups and downs, a person does change and I have changed for good. I have become much more independent now. I have started exploring my own life and have started valuing myself. I have started valuing my individuality.

Ques: When you look back at your relationship with Ssharad (Malhotra) today, do you regret anything?

Divyanka: I don’t think so. I had a beautiful journey and a beautiful association. Even though I am an actor, by nature I am what you could call a homely girl. I had no life beyond one person and I made the choice of leading that life. It was not imposed by anyone. I was very happy in the zone. But somehow…(pauses) things fell apart. I was shocked and devastated but thankfully my fracture happened.

Ques: What’s the link between your fracture and your break-up?

Divyanka: After my break-up, shooting on sets was getting difficult. I was crying from within but I couldn’t show it while shooting. ‘Andar toofan tha’. I was falling ill too and even suffered a bout of food-poisoning. People around me started saying something is jinxed.Thankfully this fracture happened and all negativity went away. Every distraction was washed off. I was handling my fracture, my professional commitments and a lot of other things. Suddenly I realised that if I can take care of all these things, a break-up is no big deal.

Divyanka enjoying first #SoloDiningOut post work out. Didn’t expect a self date dinner to be such a good experience😉 (Source: Posted on Instagram by Divyanka Tripathi)

Ques: How has life changed post break-up?

Divyanka: Earlier, I was stuck to one routine which involved one more person (Ssharad). So life was different then. But after break-up, following the same routine became difficult as I was not meeting that person and not having the earlier life.This sudden change in usual life was more devastating and it made me cry. I never discussed it with my parents as I didn’t want to burden them. Thankfully, I broke my leg and my mother came and suddenly things became beautiful. Elders bring you back to original state of mind. With them around, you try looking around for ways to make yourself happy because you know that if you are happy, they will be happy. So, I have now started looking for ways to be happy because before that all reasons were lost.

Ques: So, what are you doing differently now?

Divyanka: I have brought this engagement ring for myself and I wear it to make myself happy. I went out on a solo dinner date yesterday. We girls always end up doing things for others. You have to look good for him, cook well for him. You see, we are always under pressure to perform. Not any more. Divyanka always lived for others. Now she is enjoying some ‘me’ time and I have rediscovered a new, carefree and adventurous Divyanka.

Divyanka during one of her trips post break-up. (Source: Posted on Instagram by Divyanka Tripathi)

Ques: Where else did you derive strength from to cope up with your break-up?

Divyanka: From my fans. Their support has been overwhelming. I was a lost soul in between. I was having a loveless life. I felt nobody loved me. Around the break-up, I felt as if I was alone. From one side, I felt my love was going away and on from the other, there was this huge out pour of love from my fans that really made me feel good and special.

Ques: Are there any lessons you have learnt from this relationship?

Divyanka: Yes. We must never lose our individuality. Always make yourself happy as that will automatically make the other person happy if he loves you. Or else it will be a classic case of Hum toh doobenge sanam…tumko bhi le doobenge. Also never keep too many expectations. Greater the expectations, greater the pain will be. I have realised that I have to do things to make me happy.

Ques: Would you like to be in a relationship with someone from the industry again or would you prefer a non-industry person this time?

Divyanka: I am very skeptical right now. Thoda sa darr lagta hai (I am a bit scared now) but as the saying goes, ‘Never say never’. I won’t generalise people. Circumstances become such that people go their different ways but that doesn’t mean they are bad.

Ques: You were close to Ssharad’s parents. Are you still in touch with them?

Divyanka: I would love to keep a relation with them. I haven’t spoken to them but I really respect them a lot. I have a soft corner for his mother.

Ques: Are you open to working with Ssharad in future?

Divyanka: I will leave it to the future. Now that I am growing, I wont expect anything out of him. This relation won’t happen for me again. But I am open to working with him professionally.

Ques: You are suddenly single after long. Is that a good feeling?

Divyanka: I am getting to know now what a girl goes through when she is single. I am single now after a very long time. I was in a serious relationship earlier as well before my last one. People saw me as a devoted, homely girl. So, there was a bhabhi like respect coming in from all quarters. Suddenly now I have become a single girl. In our society, single girls are not seen with much respect. It is very easy to point fingers at a single girl. It’s weird. On one hand, we talk about women empowerment but at times women themselves don’t support single women. I am single for the first time in many years and I have to be careful with who I am seen with or else it is easy for others to start gossiping just because I am single.

Ques: Lastly, would you be open to the idea of an arrange marriage as well?

Divyanka: (Laughs) I am open to everything right now whether love or arranged. The person should be good and I want to be loved. There should be equal reciprocation of love and warmth from him. No more one-sided love. So if love happens, I would want my man to love me as much as I love him. If there is no complete love, I wouldn’t want to be in a relationship. Also I want companionship and friendship. I want to go places and I also want the other person to go places. We should help each other in growing rather than restricting ourselves while in a relation.