Shreya* (25) is a social drinker and is not particular on marrying someone from her own caste or religion. However, her profiles on matrimonial sites –www.shaadi.com,www.bharatmatrimony.com- do not indicate this. Her parents, who have put up a profile on her behalf, have made it very clear that they want a son-in-law who does not drink. “Forget the fact that they want someone who does not drink; they don’t even know their own daughter doesn’t mind knocking back a cocktail every once in a while,” laughs Shreya.
Shreya, and many like her, are in the marriage market, and yet decidedly not. Research done by companies indicates nearly 70 per cent of the profiles created on matrimonial websites are set up by parents, who use it to project their expectations of a potential son/daughter-in-law.
According to Anil Kumar, founder and CEO ofwww.jodi365.com, singles are now looking to know more than the star sign and the salary of a potential partner. “What about bigger questions like if the person wants to have children. These need to be addressed,” he says.
Given these limitations of matrimonial sites, youngsters who are taking the arranged marriage route are looking for options where expression is not met with a frown. “We have a questionnaire that takes a good twenty minutes to fill and goes into a lot of important issues letting the personality of the individuals come through,” Mr. Kumar adds. With a little under 50,000 profiles, the website has managed to turn arranged marriage into something cool.
A social mixer, a first of its kind in the city, arranged by the company saw singles coming forth to try out speed dating last week. “We tried it in Chicago where an event led to a marriage. We had five pairings after the event here,” Mr. Kumar says.
Arundhati Balachandran, CEO of Urban Tryst, operates on a similar philosophy but a different model. Urban Tryst is a matchmaking service, which has a presence online, but does not act as a matrimonial website. A little over a year old, the company screens its clients and does a face-to-face or Skype session before creating a profile for them. “We do not make these profiles public. So, there is no pressure to lie about oneself,” Ms. Balachandran says.
Her decision to start such a service stemmed from years of undergoing the same drill herself. “People are hardly honest on these matrimonial websites. We give our singles practical checklists that can be deal-breakers,” Ms. Balachandran says. The company has curated profiles from 10 countries and 22 cities in India and is organising singles nights in the city. “Whether it is karaoke or game night, it is important that people meet in fun places,” she adds.
(*name changed)
Youngsters are no longer satisfied with traditional ways of finding out and meeting prospective partners
