(Getty Images)
The second sequel is never as good.
After Novak Djokovic and Stan Wawrinka played two Australian Open classics — Wawrinka won 9-7 in a 5th-set quarterfinal last year, avenging his 12-10 fourth-round loss to the Djoker in 2013 — it stood to reason that Friday night’s battle would be another, or at least the entertaining tennis romp we usually get from men’s Grand Slam semifinals.
Instead we got Godfather III, Spider-Man 3, Batman Forever and Matrix Revolutions. If this match had been a Hollywood production it would have been a bomb and still probably more watchable than the ugly tennis with which fans were subjected on Friday night. It was espeecially a pity for all those east-coasters who got up early to watch. (That’s basically me consoling myself.)
The Godfather III was better than this. (Paramount Pictures)
1. The 6-0 fifth set
(EPA)
Prior to the decisive fifth set, it sort of felt like intermission at a play with a poor first act. “Maybe the second act will save it,” says everybody milling about the theater. It didn’t. It never does. Djokovic stormed to a 4-0 lead and ended up with a 6-0 trouncing after holding in a difficult opening game, then easily breaking Stan at 1-0. Wawrinka had opportunities to get back in the match at 0-2, 0-3 and 0-4 but it was more of the same. This fifth set was the equivalent of Francis Ford Coppola casting his daughter Sofia as Mary Corleone. The match ended, appropriately, with Wawrinka getting broken after hitting a lazy forehand wide while completely in control of the point.
2. Djokovic’s fourth set
(Reuters)
He hit no winners. None. As in zero. Z-E-R-O. Ben Rothenberg of The New York Times put it best:
Amelie Mauresmo should burn all tapes* of this match and not let Andy Murray watch, lest he think Djokovic will play as poorly in Sunday’s final.
* There aren’t tapes anymore, all “tape” is watched on computers and iPads, but saying “erase all binary debate from the SQL database” doesn’t roll off the tongue as well.
This will be the fifth Grand Slam final between Djokovic and Murray with the overall series tied at 2-2. However, both of Djokovic’s wins came in Melbourne.
3. The pushing … oh, the pushing
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With Stan struggling to get any shot to land inside the lines, the Djoker started pushing like he was playing a 14-and-under tournament against a superior opponent. (Or, maybe this is a better analogy: Caroline Wozniacki circa 2010.) The kicker is that it was the right play! Djokovic didn’t need to go for any shots because Wawrinka was missing everything. He hit 69 unforced errors. Wawrinka’s gorgeous one-handed backhand abandoned him at crucial times — break points, 30-30 points, basically the whole match. Good thing he didn’t win, or else those three balls the winners hit into the crowd might have accidentally nailed some ballboys exiting the court. (It’s not like Djokovic was much better from the winner-to-UE ratio: He hit 27 winners against 49 unforced errors.) That was the killer for Stan: Djokovic played poorly enough that Stan could have made a repeat appearance in the final. It was there for the taking and he let it slip through his fingers.
4. The calls
(EPA)
The linespeople even got in on the action, with an evening of awful work. It’s like going to see Godfather III in a theater with a sticky floor, lazy ticket taker and incompetent projectionist. (Yes, Godfather III is that bad.) There were nine successful challenges, which sounds like some sort of record. The first game of the fifth set featured two misses, neither of which were particularly close and both of which were pretty clear to the naked eye while watching on television. (They were both successfully challenged.)
5. The threat of a third sequel
(For USA TODAY courtesy LucasFilm)
Let’s hope Djokovic and Wawrinka are on other sides of the draw next year. The last thing we need is a third sequel that plumbs to new depths of awfulness. You know what I’m talking about The Phantom Menace.
