By Leaping Larry
Deep into the reaches of Wednesday night, two second-round matches at the Australian Open – Bernard Tomin v Philip Kohlschreiber and Rafael Nadal v Tim Smyczek – provided unmatched drama.
"The one thing that's been a constant is the drama," noted commentator Peter Donegan of the Nadal five-setter.
Illustration: Matt Golding
"All sorts of things happening," John Newcombe confirmed. Or didn't. The statement lacked a little for specifics.
Donegan seemed to mention "the drama" only slightly more frequently than an over-caffeinated theatre critic. He buttered up with the assertion that it had been "an extraordinarily dramatic day and night here at the championships".
It is perhaps not entirely unknown for even the best of commentators to get a little stuck on one idea from time to time.
If Pete's campaign slogan for the night was "Donegan for Drama", Newk's one idea was that Smyczek was getting "a little leg weary".
By around the 15th time the poor sap back on the couch at home had heard that diagnosis, regardless of the merits of the analysis, he or she was probably getting a little lughole weary.
However, it is undeniably reassuring to be wreathed in the technical expertise of Seven's commentary aces.
"He's off the fairway in the rough," observed Hamish McLachlan, of Nadal earlier in the match. Not a tennis reference, exactly. But Hamish is clearly a man who likes to think outside the prism.
Jim Courier got more technical than everyone else, with his striking analysis of Bernard Tomic, "His vibration dampener popped out of his racquet," adding that it caused a "trampolining effect". On removing his lab coat, Courier allowed that the net effect was that the ball had gone long.
However, Newk had the final word, regarding Nadal's game plan in the final set: "He's made up his mind he's not playing any long rallies unless he can help it."
That is, if he can help it, he will do the opposite of what he wants.
That's pretty darn technical. Every so often your head may experience a trampolining effect.