The life and times of Boring Kearney: Christmas

Boring Kearney is looking forward to Christmas

Well, it's that time of year again, not Pancake Tuesday but the next best thing, Christmas. It's a festive time and it kicks off in the Kearney household with the Christmas party. Last year me and Dave and Brian went as KISS, the American rock band formed in New York City in January 1973 by Paul Stanley and Gene Simmons. However, this year as Brian no longer plays with us, me, Dave and our lodger Ben will go as Diana Ross and two of the Supremes.

We like to be organised so we have our Christmas shopping done since last July just in case something gets popular, such as a book on fine sand. This year I managed to get Dave a tin of emulsion and as a stocking filler I got him a book of colour samples. I also got him a surprise where basically I will jump out in front of him at a random non prearranged time and I will say "surprise" and he will get a big surprise. I am not sure what Dave got me but I hope he got me the updated version of the electric whisk I currently have.

On Christmas Eve we normally like to do a dry run for Christmas day, just to make sure we have everything in order. We normally awaken at 07:32, giving ourselves a two minute lie in, it is Christmas after all and we like to give Santy a chance to get all done, he should be passing over the Dominican Republic by the time we are up. I normally send Brian a text to see if he got what he wanted from Santy and then we go down and open our presents. If any of us are not happy with our reaction we rewrap our presents and go again, such fun.

Last year I couldn't find a sock to hang up so I used a yellow Marigold and it was so funny, Santy left a pack of Marigolds in my Marigold, well I laughed until twenty past three that day, I can tell you. After the dinner we like to have a snooze and sometimes we chance a Marietta biscuit with a cup of tea before Dave pulls out the Ludo and normally we are up until all hours playing, until at least quarter past seven anyway. Then of course there is the extra washing up, there is a scramble in the Kearney household for that job. Christmas, what a time to be alive!