Cricket's Bigg Boss House: An alternate way to follow Mudgal Report updates

Take suo moto cognizance of this. You are at some point going to show contempt over the developments of the Supreme Court’s statements over the Mudgal Committee report, because you cannot keep up with the array of legalese and a disarray of characters. Unless you have a lawyer friend with an interest in cricket, we suggest you opt for our more entertaining alternative – following the inquiry news like you’d follow Bigg Boss.

With the show’s eighth season currently airing, you’d have no issues adopting the format. Here is your guide:

1. The voice of reason

‘Bigg Boss chahte hai ki team leader Srini apne khel ki taraf ka vartav badley.’

In the past few days, we have heard the sanest voice of our country, that of the Supreme Court’s, deliver rebukes to the BCCI chief, who is in the middle of the spot-fixing muddle. ‘Bigg Boss’ SC has pointed out his most glaringly obvious discrepancies - conflict of interest in owning the Chennai Super Kings, son-in-law Mieyappan being caught for betting and more.

Just like the booming voice of the show, SC’s voice is anonymous, righteous and instructive, which nobody dares to object to.

2. The power brokers

‘Day 66: Captaan Dhoni aaj ek gupt vajah se bimaar hai’

Anyone who has watched the reality show knows that amidst participants, there are some who lead by being a cross between smoothly diplomatic and downright cunning. There are power brokers in the Mudgal Show too, starting from Srinivasan himself who is doing whatever he can to retain his position.

CSK/India captain Dhoni is another, and by sitting out of the touring party to Australia with an unexplained ‘injury’, he has again played with good timing. The are also heavyweight members of the background cast, such as Sharad Pawar, the president of Mumbai Cricket Association, and some others fearing elimination, such as Raj Kundra. Meanwhile, last year’s ousted participants, Sreesanth, Chandila and Chavan are watching from the sidelines.

3. The entertainers

‘Aaj ghar walon ke liye special guest Lalit Modi ek dil-dhadak nritya karenge’

No season of Bigg Boss is complete without theatrics from oddball personalities such as a Dolly Bindra, Kamaal R Khan or Ali Quli, of the current season. Viz a viz in the Mudgal Report, there are the entertainers who have may little impact on the goings on but hold high TRP value.

The biggest case here is of Vindoo Dara Singh, who was snapped enjoying an IPL game sitting next to Mrs Dhoni, and was later arrested on betting charges. Vindoo was allegedly the link between bookies and umpire Asad Rauf, another colourful, guilty party. Vindoo recently even blamed the media for his rough time behind bars and animatedly vouched to never watch cricket again. Incidentally, he happens to be the winner of Bigg Boss Season 3.

Another entertainer par parallel has been Lalit Modi, who has donned the cheerleader costume for Team Supreme Court and has gyrated relentlessly on Twitter since the Mudgal saga began.

4. The audience

‘Raj Kundra ko ghar mein rakhne ke liye, SMS karein ‘S-H-I-L-P-A space Y’ aur bhej de…’

Those of us who watch the thrilling proceedings of the Bigg Boss house by night flip newspapers for the Mudgal Show news by day, looking for similar voyeuristic pleasure that will never really impact our lives. In both cases, high gratification comes from watching a participant getting slapped (literally or with a notice; the former happened just this week on #BB8!), a bully being reprimanded and some grey characters plotting ousters.

The difference is, unlike the #BB audience which (thinks that it) has powers to ‘vote’ for the house’s inmates and keep them in/out, cricket fans get no such privilege.

Also while at audiences, let’s also include two important stakeholders of Indian cricket – Mr Ravi Shastri and Mr Sunil Gavaskar, who have been nothing more than spectators.

5. The ratings

Bigg Boss is in its eighth season now, IPL will be in its eighth this coming summer. Whether Srini succumbs to the SC axe or not, or CSK/Royals get eliminated or not, the show will go on, with the viewers tuning in out of primetime habit more than allegiance.

Unfortunately for cricket, there will only be losers.