Niamh Horan: Glenda Gilson worth more than three brief mentions in life of Brian O'Driscoll

All eyes were on the Irish captain as he danced in Reynard’s nightclub.

His ex Glenda Gilson, however, sat in the corner of the club on the periphery of the action. And it was clear she had no interest in her former flame.

Instead her eyes were firmly fixed on the property developer sitting across the table, Johnny Ronan, a man who was to become her beau.

The year was 2009 and Glenda had clearly moved on.

O’Driscoll’s memoir, which hit the shelves last week, was punctuated with brief, but some may consider, tart references to his model ex.

The passages went unnoticed as the media honed in on a “banged up” night in New York.

There is no doubt among those who witnessed the O’Driscoll/Gilson tryst at close hand that it was a serious relationship — for both of them. It was Brian’s one high-profile relationship before meeting the woman of his dreams, Amy Huberman.

But Glenda merits barely a mention.

Yes, things had ended badly between them but isn’t that the way with many relationships?

And most people, when the raw wounds of a break-up have healed, at least have the comfort of remembering the good times.

“He would have been better leaving her out altogether,” said a close friend who knew them both socially when they dated.

The passages in which Brian addresses the relationship are three in total. Short and succinct.

In the first, Brian describes a seafront scene in Bray in which a photographer, spotting the pair, attempts to nab the first exclusive picture and publicise the budding romance.

“I’m not keen but he’s persistent,” says Brian. “There’s a crowd of unfamiliar people on his side and it feels churlish to refuse.”

He describes how Glenda, on the other hand, goes in for a kiss for the photo. What O’Driscoll documents is his perception that he played the passive, nay, reluctant, part in a showbiz-style relationship.

Those of us who remember those slightly mad days recall  Brian as compliant but always reluctant to play the fame game.

When his extrovert  girlfriend played up to the media he looked very much ill at ease at the attention.

In another, he describes how he turned up at a sexiest man awards ceremony and wondered “what am I doing here?” in “a world that feels alien to me.”

He says when the invite came, his first instinct was to “knock it for six”.

He explains he resisted but, “in the end, trying to keep other people happy,” he says he reluctantly agreed.

Glenda was a judge on the panel and appeared in the audience of The Late Late Show where she was interviewed by Pat Kenny on Brian’s inclusion on the list.

Afterwards he spoke to his friend Den who had watched the show “horrified”.

“How did this happen? He asks,” writes Brian. “It’s a good question. It takes me a while to figure it out. I’ve got a fair idea of who I really am, of who I was brought up to be, but it takes me a little longer to fully become that person.”

Looking back on what he labels an embarrassing episode the rugby star laments that be failed to live by the age old dictum ‘Tibi ipsi dic verum’ (To thine own self be true). “I went against my gut and compromised myself,” he says.

What was their three-year relationship all about?

Brian admits he fell for her good looks while Glenda was delighted to be romancing one of Ireland’s rocketing sport’s stars.

At the time, O’Driscoll was sporting bleached blond hair and began popping up occasionally on the Dublin nightclub scene.

But soon the publicity around their relationship was unrelenting.

No story about their relationship seemed too frivolous to prevent publication but in 2006 Brian, began to hate the pop of photographers’ flash guns.

O’Driscoll dumped her at the end of a night’s drinking after losing an important game against Munster 30-6.

He deals with it in one succinct line: “By the time the night is over I’ve broken up with Glenda.”

He said in an interview after the break up: “Everyone who has been in a relationship knows that there are highs and lows and to have them in the public domain as well is a tough pill to swallow.”

He went on: “I’m public property when I’m on the pitch but I’d like to think I’m not public property off it.”

This weekend a photographer, who followed Brian closely both during his time with Glenda and his subsequent relationship with Amy spoke of the dramatic turn -around once he learned the life lesson that you can’t put the celebrity genie back in the bottle.

“He was allergic to the media attention on his personal life.”

In his book Brian says he tries to pass on what he learned to the younger players.

“I see young guys making similar mistakes, there’s a part of me that wants to pull them aside for a friendly word, but I figure there’s really no point because they’ve got to live it for themselves.”

In a generation where everyone has a camera phone and instant access to global publication — it’s clear they are up against it.”

What is clear from the book is that now, with the passage of time, Brian really didn’t like the person he had become at that time of his life when he was with Glenda — a rising sports star pictured in social pages and as one half of the Irish ‘Posh and Becks’.

Maybe he now feels  embarrassed by it and feels he has to explain himself and say: “Hey guys this wasn’t really me.”

Yet in erasing the Glenda years from his memory banks he has done them both a disservice.

Those who watched the show all those years ago know that, at one stage at least,they were very much in love.

It was worth more than three  brief mentions in the story of his life.