NEEDHAM – At age 24, Mimi Clark enjoys typical interests such as cooking, painting, arts and crafts, and bird watching. But the Westwood resident has long considered exercise a chore.
Until she met Michael O’Neil.
The 15-year-old was paired with Clark as her swim coach at the Charles River YMCA in his hometown of Needham last winter. Not until the lessons began, however, did Clark and O’Neil each learn that the other is on the autistic spectrum too.
During their weekly, hourlong lessons, O’Neil helped Clark improve her swim technique and endurance toward her goal of competing in the Special Olympics Massachusetts Summer Games in June. O’Neil, who learned to swim at the Charles River YMCA as a boy, offered the perfect mix of enthusiasm and know-how. He was on the YMCA Tsunami team, competed in Special Olympics for two years with the Wellesley STARS, and still swims for Needham High School, where he will be a junior this fall.
O’Neil’s volunteer role evolved through a partnership in which Needham High students coach YMCA swimmers who are training for the Special Olympics. They gain leadership skills along with community service credits toward their high school graduation requirement, while the athletes enjoy customized lessons and one-on-one support.
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Yet all agree that the benefits of the program extend beyond the pool.
Mimi’s mother, Amanda Clark MacMullan, said the program was like “finding an oasis in the desert” because recreational and social opportunities, along with their funding sources, have dwindled as her daughter has gotten older. Seeking a fun way for Clark to get more physical activity while interacting with others, she enrolled her at the YMCA – and then hoped for the best.
“Mimi has many hobbies, but like many of us, she focuses on things that keep her on the couch and in her comfort zone,” said MacMullan, who additionally worried that Clark’s sensitivity to loud noises would trigger anxiety amid the echoes of the pool area.
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“I kept telling her how fun it would be, and we went online to pick out a new bathing suit,” MacMullan recalled, “but she still wasn’t that into it.”
Her attitude turned around almost upon arrival. According to MacMullan, the front desk employees were warm and welcoming, offering a smile and much needed encouragement. Then Clark was introduced to O’Neil.
“They’re at different places [on the autism spectrum], but Mimi zeroed in on Michael being like her right away,” MacMullan said. “She knew he would understand her and support her.”
Clark said their nine-year age difference is inconsequential. For his part, O’Neil said, “I just think of her as an athlete.”
“He’s a real teacher,” Clark said. “He’s helpful and fun, and he’s always smiling.” Asked how that makes her feel, she enthused, “Very happy!”
For O’Neil, the initial decision to coach was difficult because he wouldn’t be able to volunteer while still competing in Special Olympics with his beloved Wellesley STARS. However, Jeanne Hopkins believes that her son’s connection with Clark cemented the decision.
“Michael practically runs out the door on coaching days,” Hopkins said. “He has stepped into a leadership role, and he’s thriving. Instead of being the kid who is receiving help, he is giving it. When he is in the pool coaching Mimi, he is someone with abilities, instead of someone with disabilities.”
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O’Neil praised Clark’s progress thus far, noting that she does a great job using proper arm techniques and keeping her legs straight.
“It was kind of hard for her at first,” he recalled of Clark’s first lesson. “I remembered when it was hard for me. Those memories helped me coach her. I knew she would have fun, feel more self-confidence, and learn good skills for her whole life.”
Asked if his coaching relationship has evolved into friendship, he replied, “Are you kidding? I definitely see her as a friend. She’s so sweet, so loving. I’m just glad I met her.”
Although a family obligation prevented Clark from competing in Special Olympics this summer, MacMullan said it is the process, rather than a single event, that has made all the difference. In fact, Clark has occasionally trained with O’Neil over the summer, and looks forward to the Special Olympics swim season resuming this winter.
Their partnership, MacMullan said, has been transformative. Clark “just beams” as she lays out her bathing suit the night before their lessons, and has started going to the YMCA an extra day during the week to ride the exercise bike. She takes special pride in having developed the relationship independently of her mother.
“I normally set up play dates, but this friendship blossomed on its own around a shared activity,” MacMullan said. “Michael feels a sense of purpose, and Mimi feels a sense of direction. It’s a wonder, and so far beyond my expectations.”
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Sheri Kovalchek, director of youth development and teen programming at the Charles River YMCA, said witnessing their bond develop is “one of those stories, when you see it in action, that gives you goose bumps and makes you get a little teary.
“The Y says you’re not only welcome here, you belong here,” Kovalchek said. In addition to the adaptive swim program, of which the Special Olympics team is a part, the Charles River YMCA offers inclusive fitness programs and personal training. Plans are in place to add bowling and basketball programs this winter.
“We teach the individual, rather than a one-size-fits-all approach,” she added. “We provide a quiet, safe place just for them, that’s not filled with 25 kids doing cannonballs.”
Kovalchek notes that O’Neil was her most “dedicated and eager” volunteer, consistently arriving early for the biweekly practices and warmly encouraging all the swimmers he coached to set and achieve personal goals. She admits to initially hovering over all the pairs in order to determine if a second coach was required to support an athlete.
From the beginning, however, she realized that O’Neil’s relationship with Clark was special.
“He’s funny and outgoing, and Mimi is really laid back, and it just works even though they came together by happenstance,” Kovalchek said. “Mike senses Mimi’s anxieties and physical limitations, and he instinctively knew when she needed a break before I did. It has been an amazing experience for me to learn from this 15-year-old kid.”
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Clark said her goal is to win a gold medal at the Special Olympics in June 2015. Someday, she hopes she can be O’Neil’s volunteer assistant and teach others like her.
“This is a heart-on-your-sleeve population, but also one that can easily be invisible,” MacMullan said.
Cindy Cantrell can be reached at cindycantrell20
@gmail.com.