This morning I didn’t feel up to reading the paper. The same jod-tod of politicians, the same stories of muck and filth in the society and the same borrowed wisdom peddled in clever phrases. We have our own pressing concerns than to know why Michelle Obama visited Beijing’s Forbidden City along with her mother and two daughters. My present concern is to get rich quick. Not in lakhs, but crores and crores. I can’t think of looting a bank in these days of tightened security (elections are at hand, you know) and in any case what I am to find in the vault but moldy pre-2005 notes for which there will soon be no takers. There is no scope for me of a hefty bribe either, as I don’t have the authority even of a city constable to ease out a fifty-rupee note from a street hawker’s palm. Nor can I dupe investors with promises of three-fold returns in as many months, because – because, poor sods, they too are pursuing the same dream as I am – the dream of getting rich quick. But how?
‘Follow the path of parmaartha, son!’ Kaga Bhushundi Ji cawed from where he was perched on my shoulder.
‘Kaga Ji, first, I am in no mood of listening to your crummy advice, and then your caw-cawing hurts my ears. Come some other time.’ I said irritably, brushing him away.
‘But you had a question for me,’ said the wise crow from mid air.
‘Yes, I did. And what is your answer? Parmaartha – go, do good to others. Ha! Ha! Here I am thinking of making quick money and you tell me to serve others….’
‘My fault,’ rejoined Kaga Ji, ‘The sages have well said, “Impart gyan – knowledge – only to those who deserve it.” You are too flighty. But now that I am here, listen to me patiently. As the world changes with time, so do the meanings we attach to the words that we use. These days ‘parmaartha’ does not always mean what it did in the days bygone…’
‘Enough of your semantics! Tell me what the word means now.’
‘These days ‘parmaartha’ means ‘param artha’ – make the most (money) in the service of others.’
‘And how does one do that?’
‘Do as your netas do. There is one such, who in 2008 had measly assets worth Rs 6009, all said. In five years his income had risen nearly to Rs.30 lakh. There is another neta who was then five thousand short of a lakh and now he claims to be worth 374 lakh. There are instances galore in rajneeti….’
KAGA BHUSHAUNDI SPEAKETH
Suman K Sharma
‘I see. But you haven’t told me how their sorts do it.’
‘It’s quite simple. Suppose you are in a position to grant favours of one or the other kind. A supplicant approaches you to advance his cause over his rivals, or get him what he does not rightly deserve. You back him and he achieves his desired end. Highly obliged, the supplicant leaves you a shade richer than before and so on.’
‘But that would be bare-faced bribery,’ I said.
‘Not bribery, it is chadaava – offering – my son. Even gods don’t grant favours without proper offerings being made to them,’ said Kaga Ji and was gone.
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